We have all seen them before. Those guys at lunch talking about their girlfriends. The size of her butt, her rack, the way she moans. These conversations seem to always devolve into a debauched contest of who can say the most disgusting thing about their significant other. That is what our society calls manly. Men are expected to be athletic, domineering, and studly. They are told that it is cool to cheat, that it is cool to share nudes among friends, because how else can you show how successful you are as a men. The thinking seems to be "I've gotten more tail then you, I'm better than you."
Consider this, there are two guys. One is a intelligent, socially awkward, considerate young boy. The other is the star of the foot ball team, he is a partier and he loves sharing stories of his sexual adventures. We all know which boy will be considered cooler, but who is the real man?
This is a call for a new masculinity. If you are a guy who respects women, who sees them a potential friends rather than as potential scores, come out of hiding. Come out and change the world
This is so incredible. I completely agree with your idea, because i'm a nerdier guy who is quite socially awkward at times. Masculinity should change. It would be a change for the better.
ReplyDeleteI do think you are describing to "binary opposites". There are boys who are not socially awkward who are respectful of women and boys who are nerds who are not. Also, you might examine the role being in a group plays in how men (and women) act and what they say.
ReplyDeleteMy goal wasn't so much as using binary opposites as it was showing how morality and society don't always aline. Are the sexist nerds? Of course. Are there respectful athletes? Absolutely. What really matters is how a particular person treats other people. What I was really trying to show was how society sometimes lifts bad people up and can also suppress good people. Being a good person is something everyone should strive for, male or female. It isn't just manly, it's "hu"manly.
DeleteI do think you are describing to "binary opposites". There are boys who are not socially awkward who are respectful of women and boys who are nerds who are not. Also, you might examine the role being in a group plays in how men (and women) act and what they say.
ReplyDeleteI agree with this but rather than a "new masculine" how bout we just forget about masculinity!
ReplyDeleteMasculinity is, especially in this day and age, useless. What does it do besides put women in a lower place and an enormous amount of pressure on boys? Studies show that by making a boy be "manly" and not cry and such creates an enormous amount of emotional stress and winds up becoming anger and in many cases leads to domestic violence. Men wind up unhappy because they can't enjoy so many delightful things and women are unhappy because they have to play trophy to a hunk of flesh with the emotional capacity of a brick wall.
Let's get rid of it!!
Personally, I don't want a living hunk of testosterone as a boyfriend. Sure, there's some "manly" traits I like, but it's not whats most important, especially cause some of it, I embody too.
I rather have a guy who can express emotion than one who's cold.
And another thing, now a days all the body positive stuff is about girls. What about guys? You aren't GI joe and girls aren't barbie and yet were all beautiful!!
Why can't my future husband want to take care of kids too? Isn't that so much better? Why does the guy have to be perfect?
Neither men or women are carbon copies and men can like "feminine" things and women can like "masculine" things!
Boys, not enough feminists talk about you! Youre humans. Girls are humans.
So be proud of your stomach whether there's a six pack or not and love yourself whether you're awkward or suave and don't be afraid to watch an action movie or a romcom and don't be scared of not being an athlete.
I'm not a super model nor am I some smooth perfect person and I'm not perfectly polite and no one is or can be, so why should I expect a guy to be like that?
Society needs to stop worrying about masculinity, because if it's true love, she or he or they won't need someone who's masculine. They'll need you